I’ve been in a bit of a slump recently, financially, emotionally, and physically. This isn’t the first time I’ve felt this way, and I’m sure it won’t be the last either. Part of living is dealing with the hard times as well as the good times. You can’t have one without the other and I’m trying to remind myself of that, because I know I’ve had plenty of the good, and I still do. But aspects of my current life are not as I would like them to be at this point in my life. Let me explain.
Working for Walt Disney World, I’m feeling very unfulfilled in my job, and it’s taking a toll on the rest of my life. Come January 13th, I’ll have been with the company two years. In my mind, at this point in my Disney career, I should be further along. I wanted to be, and I could have been. I still can be. In two years I’ve done two different roles in three locations, being trained in two systems and two attraction complexes. Since January of 2014, I’ve been trained at Pirates of the Caribbean, Splash Mountain, Tom Sawyer Island and The Country Bear Jamboree. I learned the merchandise computer system as well as the Fastpass+ system. The happiest I have ever been was the time I spent at Pirates. If you’ve known me or read this blog at all, you’ll know how in love I am with that attraction. I had to leave it twice, and I’m never going to be able to go back. My heart is broken, but I know it’s not the end of my Happiness at Disney. I’ve learned that Merchandise wasn’t a match for me, and neither is Frontierland. Being in two areas I’m not happy has been a struggle. I want to find my Disney Home, and I’m trying.
When I first started working for the company, I thought it would be awesome to not fall in love with anything and to travel my way through property trying new things. I’ve reminded myself of that dream of two years ago, and that’s what I’m going to try for now. I’m going to transfer to different places and see how it feels to learn different roles and different areas of the massive property of WDW. I want to take a break from Attractions and the theme parks, and maybe try resorts. Magic Kingdom is my favorite park on property, and its magic has been fading for me because it makes me too sad to be there for work, that I don’t want to be there for pleasure. I want that back.
A few days ago I had to park in Guest Parking to go to work. I walked onto Main Street USA and saw the Christmas decorations for the first time this year and heard the castle show, Dream Along With Mickey. As I walked past and into Frontierland, I began to cry. Just as Mickey says, “Take the dream with you, wherever you may go!” I lost it. I’ve momentarily lost my Dream, and I’m trying to pick it back up. For me, hopefully, taking a break from the Magic Kingdom is my solution.
I’m so lucky to work for this company. Even if I don’t get paid enough and days can be long and guests can be mean, there are so many days that are wonderful and guests who are so kind. I know there are better things out there for me within the company, I just have to search for them.
I don’t have a degree. I didn’t know if I ever wanted to go back to school. Even though I don’t want a cubicle desk job, I’m starting to think that I would still like to pursue a degree. I already have about 40 credit hours of general studies done, and I was loving the Public Relations class I was in my last semester. So today I started doing some research and collecting information about classes I could take online one at a time. Even if it takes some time, I don’t think finishing up a degree is going to hurt me at all. It may not help, but it might. But I would hate to not have one and then find a place within the company that at least wants me to have something to show for myself. One class a semester will be slow-going, but not impossible. I could get three or four classes a year done and graduate soon enough. I don’t want to overwhelm myself, but right now with my uncertainties about my career, I can’t help but think that online classes will help me have a focus on something solid and will give me a better advantage than if I didn’t have any degree.
Maybe 2016 is my year. Maybe this is a wake-up call and a time to get inspired to become whatever I want. I’ll never forget the day I moved out of the dorms at Hardin-Simmons University and my RA, Whitney, hugged me and said, “You’re going to do great things. And I’m going to watch.” This is why my blog is entitled “Orlando Is Calling;” it never stopped calling when I moved here. Orlando wants me here and I want it too.