Tomorrow marks two years since checking into my Disney College Program. In two years I have “earned my ears” five times, learning two different roles, three attractions, and two systems. My time working at Walt Disney World has been contained to Magic Kingdom, with the exception of a few merchandise shifts picked up here and there. But for two years I have been statused to the most magical of all the parks at the WDW Resort. I’ve had a lot of great times here, and I’ve dealt with my share of heartache here as well.
In those two years, I have loved what I do, but I have also struggled with coming to work. During my time here, half has been in a place I consider home away from home, while the rest has been less-than-desirable. I know I’m able to be an A+ Cast Member, because I’ve been that before. Currently, I feel as though I waver between being a C and a B- Cast Member at best. I’ve become the person who shows up to work and collects a check.
I see nothing wrong with having that kind of job. A job is meant to support you and yours financially and it doesn’t have to be fun. But I’ve had jobs that I loved, and I’ve had that at Disney, and I believe that I still can. Recently, I’ve been in a major depression that has affected how I am at work and how I see my position with this company. For a while, it seemed as though I was going to be stuck here for the rest of my life–and that isn’t the way I wanted to think about a job with Disney. I thought because I came to Florida to work for Disney that it was the only career option I could ever have now. I have come to realize that, yes, Orlando did call me here. But it doesn’t mean I have to be stuck. Just making that connection with myself has made all the difference.
With that, I’m making a change in my Disney career. I’m going to try to find my place here again, and I think going to a different park may be the best thing for me right now. Too many thing in Magic Kingdom remind me of the past and I think it’s prohibiting me from moving on. Not only am I going to try and find my place in a different park, I’ve also made the decision to allow myself to leave if I don’t find my place. I used to think I would be a failure if I quit Disney because that’s why I moved here. Now I know that is not the case. As long as I don’t leave on bad terms or get fired, I can always come back. I can come back front-line, or I could come back professionally once I finish school. All I know is I’m not tied to anything.
I genuinely hope that I find home again. But I’ve made peace with myself to not feel so much pressure about it. All I want is to feel happy going to play at the parks for fun and to not hate my job. Life is too short to hate your job, especially when you work for Disney.
In the meantime, I’m going to send in my college transcripts and work on a degree and see where that takes me. Life is so vast and at times scary, but I will never regret the experiences I have had in Orlando and I hope to have many more adventures here. So happy two-year anniversary to me, and here’s to whatever future time I spend here.